When Fathers and Sons Are Comrades

When Fathers and Sons are Comrades By a Grandfather of Today (Conclusion) FROM what was shown in the first article, it is easy to indicate in this paper that if fathers and sons were comrades in work, in play, in study, in camping out, then it further follows that: VI. Fathers Grow Young Again Few men are so old, with their sons yet about them, that they do not remember the day when the world of life lay all unexplored before them. They will recall the eager vision, the rosy ideal of life, the joyous hope, that were theirs as they were proudly and joyfully just coming into manhood. Then they fancied that real life lay in achievement, in self-realization, in worthy attainment. Before long, however, the young man discovered that he could not achieve, alone and unaided, his highest destiny; he needed a companion and helpmate; so he fell in love. It was his thought that he first fell in love, and then thought he needed a helpmate; but if the affair, as religious people are inclined to believe, was heaven's doing quite as much as his own, then the first statement represents the true order. At any rate, he then, as all men do, bowed before the stainless scepter of womanhood, and was proud to acknowledge, before that shrine, his undying devotion to the uncrowned queen whom he had chosen. There was no illusion in all this; for the real meaning, the predestined end of his love affair, was greater than even his exalted imagination could picture. There was present a divine element, which he could sense, yet could dimly perceive, if he could perceive it at all. George Eliot says: "That adoration which a young man pays to a woman whom he feels to be superior to himself, is not dis- tinguishable from religious feeling and worship." She means that it is not merely the lover's fancy that in this great hour heaven has come near to him and has touched his life with ennobling powers. "What great and worthy love," continues George Eliot, "is not truly so, whether of woman, or child, or art, or music? Our caresses, our tender words, our still' raptures, under the influence of autumn sunsets, or pillared vistas, or calm and majestic statues, or Beethoven symphonies — all bring with them the consciousness that these are but waves and ripples in an unfathomable ocean of love and beauty. Our emotion at its highest flood rushes beyond its object and loses

918 IMPROVEMENT ERA itself in the sense of the divine mystery. Beauty has an expression beyond and far above the one woman's soul that it clothes, even as the words of genius have commonly a wider meaning than the thought which prompted them. It is more than woman's love that moves us in a woman's eyes. It seems to be a far-off, mighty love, which has come near to us, and made for itself a speech there." VII. They See More Truly the Part They Play If, as I believe, the words of this great woman are true, then love is heaven's work, in which, with the aid of woman, man feebly, humbly, takes his part. It is the common mistake to suppose that all this drama is enacted for ourselves only, whereas it is but a part in the play, in which the actors are taking such parts as it hath pleased the Director to assign to them. It implies the presence of a new and greater divinity — the person for whom all sacrifice and labor are bestowed. That person is the child, who is the meaning, the object, the life, of the history of mankind. Hence, whenever this remarkable and undoubtedly predestined arrangement is broken up. the heavens, as well as the earth and its people, must weep. The greatest men and women testify that the true ideal is the child rather than the fully developed man as history reveals him. It is the child, Tennyson shows in "The Princess," that can reunite the warring and "disillusioned" hearts of adults. So that, if men would win back a love that they have lost, let them lead the boys, play with the boys, esteem the boys; for the mother can forgive everything, perhaps, better than neglect of her children. VIII. Parents Keep Faith With Each Other Some readers, however, may suspect that it is enthusiasm and philosophical subtlety, rather than cool and judicial judgment, that would rate comradeship with boys as a prime means of lessening the numbers of recent divorce proceedings with their attendant evils. But it is plain that in this simple and joyful work of cooperation with youth lies the possibility of binding up many of the breaking hearts and restoring certain of the wrecked homes which result from the divorces of our time. Once, in a court room, I saw the stage set for one of these tragedies. The judge was keeping his eyes on a newspaper, in which I suspect he saw little. A few spectators waited in silence. The husband, with downcast eyes, was near. Just then — "With slow and stately step there came a lady through the hall, While breathless silence chained the lips and touched the hearts of all; I knew that queenly form again, though blighted was its bloom, And marked how grief had decked it out, an offering for the tomb.

WHEN FATHERS AND SONS ARE COMRADES 919 I knew the eye, though faint i;s light, that once so brightly shone; I knew the voice, still musical, that thrilled with every tone; I knew the ringlets, almost gray, once threads of living gold; I knew that bounding step of grace, that symmetry of mould — " of that brilliant and vivacious girl acquaintance of my youth, the tragedy of whose home-life I was now, mute and pained, about to witness. "Even now I see her bursting forth upon her bridal morn, A new star in the firmament, to light and glory born." ■ The attempt to insist upon one's own rights and prerogatives, rather than to consider duties and obligations, leads to estrangement and may result in separation. Perhaps nothing else more quickly causes us to forget ourselves in the happiness of others than does this mingling with young people in their joys and fun. Then the far-off enjoyment that we imagine is sometime to come to us from wealth, from fame, from achievement, is completely outshone by joy in the living present — one of the best lessons, for the am- bitious to learn. Then we can say, with Annie Pike: "Not for the wealth of kingdoms. Nor the fame that yestcr beguiled. Would I give the joy of knowing The trusting love of a child." Boy Boy, you're the pride and the light of my life; I'm leaving all, dear, for you. Boy, for the sake of thy dear father's faith, And thy mother's heart be true. boy. true. Seek not the world with its glitter and sham. Look not at its miraged joy; Conquer the whisper so false in thy ears, And be true to thy teachings, my boy. Boy. when you're all that we have here on earth. How can you forget our pain? Do you not know that we, loving, can see The real things that are permanent gain? Keep clear from the sins of the world, my boy. Seek not for its wealth untold. Gather thee flowers from the noblest thoughts, And the blessings of God for thy gold. Linnie Fisher Robinson