In Lighter Mood

IN LIGHTER MOOD,

Typographical errors are as often a source of amuse- ment as they are of annoyance; and it is some times to be more than half suspected that the "errors" are the sly work of some typographical "wag," rather than the result of acci- dent. It has now become a saw that it is but one step from

the sublime to the ridiculous, and no one has such oppor- tunity as the typo for making writers and speakers take that step; and the impulse to make them take it, we suspect, be- — comes irresistible hence many of the supposed typographi- cal slips in literary work, especially in periodical literature. The following from a contemporary presents cases in point: A theatrical critic, in a notice of a charming young actress, whose treatment of Portia had afforded him much pleasure, wrote, "Her love for Portia made acting easy." That was right enough, but what the types made him say was, "Her love for Porter," &c. A compositor, who was better ac- quainted with the geography of the West than with Biblical lore, set up the phrase, "From Alpha to Omega," as "From Alton to Omaha," and possibly found himself compelled to start for those places next morning. In the earlier half of the present century it was announced in a London newspaper that "Sir Robert Peel, with a party of friends, was shooting peasants in Ireland," whereas the minister and his friends were only indulging in the comparatively harmless pastime of pheasant-shooting. Shortly after the battle of Inkerman, one of the morning papers informed its readers that "after a des- perate struggle the enemy was repulsed with great laughter," in- stead of slaughter.What the bridesmaids at a recent wed- ding must have thought when they read that they had all worn

IN LIGHTER MOOD. 517

"handsome breeches, the gift of the bridegroom," one can only guess. But, whatever their thoughts may have been at see- ing their pretty brooches thus transformed, their language at any rate cannot, we may assume, have matched that of the politician who read the following comment on one of his — speeches "Them asses believed him." Possibly he was not much consoled by being assured that the reporter had merely wished to signify that "The masses believed him." On another occasion a reporter wrote, "At these words the entire audience arose and rent the air with their snouts."

A COUPLE OF sailors, just returned from a long voyage, strolled into the bar-parlor of a public-house near the docks at Hull. Above the rumble of the traffic in the street could be heard at intervals a harsh unmusical voice. After listen- ing intently for a moment, one of the sailors turned to his companion and said, "Eh, Jack, lad, it's a long time since we heard that song!" "What song?" "The one that fel- " low's singing in the street— 'The Light o' Other Days.' "Stow it!" ejaculated the other gruffly. "That fellow ain't

singing 'The Light of Other days' at all, man. I've been

listening to him. He's a-piping 'The Banks of Allan Water. "'

Each sailor was certain he was right, and, with characteristic — contempt for money, a wager was made a month's wages depending on the result. "Here, Tommy," called out one of the men to the little son of the landlord, "run out and get to know what that fellow's singing." Tommy departed on his errand, which did not take many minutes. "Well," de- manded Jack, when the youngster returned, "which of us is right?" "Naythur," replied Tommy, grinning. "The fel- ler's not singing. He's hawking fly-papers." * * *

A SERIOUS-MANNERED Irish member of the British parlia- ment, relates a well-known English writer, in one of our magazines, remembered for a brief correspond- American is

ence he read to the delighted house. It was introduced in a in debate on the Irish Sunday-closing bill. speech delivered The member referred to had, he confidentially informed the

I

house, an uncle who regularly took six tumblers of whiskey- toddy daily. This troubled him, and, after much thought, he resolved to write and remonstrate with his relative. The fol- — — lowing was the letter "My dear uncle I write to say how pleased I should be if you could see your way to giving up your six glasses of whiskey a day. I am sure you would find many advantages in doing so, the greatest of which would be that, as I am persuaded, it would be the means of lengthen- ing your days." The uncle replied — "My dear nephew — am much obliged to you for your dutiful letter. I was so much struck by what you said, and in particular by your kind wish to lengthen my days, that last Friday I gave up the whiskey. I my boy, as to my days be- believe you are right, ing lengthened, for, bedad, it was the longest day I ever re-

member!" * * *

Professor Max Muller has an interesting article in a late number of Cosmopolis on Royalties. In the course of it he refers to meeting the late Queen of Holland at luncheon at Dean Stanley's. The queen had asked the dean to invite a — number of literary men Tennyson, Monckton, Milnes (Lord Houghton), Huxley and several more. The company were waiting and waiting, but Tennyson did not appear. Stanley suggested that they should not wait any longer, but the queen refused to sit down before the great poet's arrival. At last it was suggested that Tennyson might be mooning about in the cloisters, and so he was. He was caught, and was placed next to the queen. The queen. Professor Max Muller goes on to tell, knew wonderfully how to hide her crown and put everybody at their ease. She took the conversation into her own hands, and kept the ball rolling during the whole lunch- eon. But she got nothing out of Tennyson. He was evi- dently in low spirits, and, sitting next to him, the professor could hear how to every question the queen addressed to him, he answered "Yes ma'am," "No ma'am," and at last, by a great effort, "Ma'am, there is a good deal to be said on both sides of the question." He then turned to the professor, and said, in a whisper, but a loud whisper, "I wish they had put some of you talking fellows next to Regina."