In Lighter Mood

IN LIGHTER MOOD.

Seeing behind the scenes may spoil a performance.

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It is sometimes easier to get a hold on certain enterprises than it is to let go. * * *

It was in Salt Lake City. The street car was quite full of people going to one of the suburbs. At a stop, a man boarded who was very much the worse for liquor. He staggered over into a seat which happened to be next to a lady who looked like a temperance preacher, or the author of some reform movement. Then the lady began lecturing the conductor for admitting the man in such a condition. The car man held his peace, and blushed at her righteous cause. Seeing no farther impression on him, she turned to the passengers who were lectured by the wholesale on the beastliness of the intruder next her, and the degradation of a company who would let such a person ride. There were glances from one to another, but no answer save silence which seemed to give consent. In desperation the lady turned to the man himself, and began, "You dirty brute; you ought to be ashamed of yourself! Are you not ashamed of your actions? You are no man!" with much more of like matter, closing with: "Do you know what I would do if you were my husband?'' The drunk sat with his chin on his breast, nodding with each shake of the car, but seemed to wake with that question, and, after some effort, which greatly amused the crowd, blurted out, "No-o-m'am-hicwhat would ye d-do?" "I'd give you poison," sharp and curt.

Then there was silence, in which the "brute" joined for a moment, after which he broke the spell with, "Do you-hic-know w-what I'd do if I was your h-hus-hic-band?" "No, what would you do, you brute?" There was some more nodding on the part of the drunk, and general expectation among the passengers, then the drunken fellow splurted out, "I'd take it." Tableau, and a general roar from the audience.