In Lighter Mood

LIGHTER MOOD.

A baker who bought his butter in pound rolls from a farmer, notic- ing that the rolls looked rather small, weighed them, and found that they were all under a pound in weight. Thereupon he put the farmer into the county court. "These butter rolls," said the judge, "are certainly under a pound in weight. Have you any scales?" he asked. "I have," said the farmer. "And have you any weights? "No, sir." "Then how do you weigh your butter?" "That's very simple," said the farmer. "While I've been selling but- ter to the baker I've been buying pound loaves from him and I have used them for weights on my own scales." * * *

As Artemus Ward was once traveling in the cars, dreading to be bored and feeling miserable, a man approached him, sat down and said, "Did you hear that last thing on Horace Greeley?" "Greeley? Greeley?" said Artemus. "Horace Greeley? Who is he?" The man was quiet about five minutes. Pretty soon he said, "George Francis Train is kicking up a good deal of a row over Eng- land. Do you think they will put him in a bastile?" "Train? Train? George Francis Train?" said Artemus, solemnly, "I never heard of him." This ignorance kept the man quiet about fifteen minutes, then he said, "What do you think about General Grant's chances for the Presi- dency? Do you think they will run him?" "Grant? Grant? Hang it man," said Artemus, "you appear to know more strangers than any man I ever saw." The man was furious. He walked off, but at last came back and said, "You confounded ignoramus, did you ever hear of Adam?" "What was his other name?"