--- title: Improvement Era description: Monthly periodical of the Mormon church, 1897 onward. This library holds the issues of November 1897 to December 1930. authors: - Hugh J. Cannon collections: - periodicals tags: - magazine - improvement-era periodical: Improvement Era volume: 33 number: 11 published: 1930-09 publisher: Young Men’s Mutual Improvement Associations publisher_place: Salt Lake City language: en type: magazine reference: "Hugh J. Cannon, “Expatriation,” *Improvement Era* 33, no. 11 (September 1930): 734–735." source: url: https://archive.org/details/improvementera3311unse transcription: Transcribed from the Internet Archive scan of each issue (the item for each issue is named in the issue's own source); unnumbered advertising leaves are omitted, printed page numbers are kept as page markers. identifier: improvementera3311unse start_page: 734 end_page: 735 rights: status: public-domain basis: US publication 1930 or earlier (published 1930-09) source: https://archive.org/details/improvementera3311unse publication_year: 1930 note: The Internet Archive item metadata carries a blanket "© Copyright by Intellectual Reserve, Inc." notice. The library owner judged it inapplicable because this issue was published in 1930, before 1931; a scan-level notice does not restore copyright. --- # Expatriation Expatriation HUGH J. CANNON Chapter Two T, HE Maui was about to sail from its San Francisco pier for Honolulu. The hurry and confusion inseparable from such a departure prevailed. Porters were carrying the last of the luggage aboard, and the final sack of mail had been swung to the deck. Cau- tious ones had already taken fare- well of friends on the wharf, pre- ferring to lose a few moments of conversation rather than run the risk of being left. Mr. and Mrs. Redfield and their adopted daughter were near the gangway. Silent and oppressed they stood, one of the girl's hands in her father's and the other in her mother's. For Nell, after a tearful appeal from the woman who had cared for her with such tender love, had repented of the determination never again to address them by those sacred titles. 1 HE pungent smell of the sea, of paint, of tar and rope came to Nell as it had a score of years before when she was leav- ing Apia. Associated with the odor was the fact that then, too, tears had been shed because she must say good-bye to some loved ones, and even in her present trouble she recalled that during all the intervening years a combina- tion of any two of these odors had invariably brought a feeling of deep and, until now, unaccount- able depression. "Not for two years, Father," she said at last, "must you think of bringing Mother to see me. It will take at least that long to work out my plans. After that, if everything seems favorable, I shall be so happy to see you. But remember, it's to be a visit only. My future is to be with the island natives, and you couldn't endure the tropical climate." "But my baby girl, you can't en- dure the climate either! And it's worse than death to think of you alone among those half-civilized peoples." Nell made a courageous effort to smile. "Now, Mother, you're forgetting our solemn agreement to be cheerful at the last minute." That's right, Mother," put in Mr. Redfield. His own lips were trembling as with palsy, and tears were running down his checks. "We are to give our brave daughter an encouraging send-off. The last thing she sees must be smiles." sustaining arms of the judge were ready, otherwise she might have fallen. Mrs. Redfield called to a porter for a glass of water. The girl smiled pitifully. "I'm all right, Mother, jit was my soul's last despairing struggle against leaving you." A HEAVILY laden porter passed and Nell saw the initials N. E. on one of the bags. It startled her. She and Nate had planned such a trip as a honey- moon, a visit to Hawaii and Sa- moa, and the thought that those same letters might have been on her own luggage, that a very dear one would be going with her to- ward a future full of promise, undermined the determination to be calm. Now the hateful con- trast, journeying alone, under such circumstances, stealing away from her lover to avoid a parting too painful to endure, looking into a future not brightened by a single ray of sunshine! Fortunately the I. LN spite of good resolu- tions Mrs. Redfield broke down. K Philosophy AD I loved less nobly. You and I might now Have our Loaf and verses Underneath the bough. Might have braved opinions, Tasted all delights, Viewed together these drear depths From our starry heights. Had I loved less wisely, You might once have cried, "All your kisses warm me not Since honor died!" — Rosannah Cannon. rpRTUNATELY the steamer's whistle sounded its final warning to passengers that in an- other moment all connection be- tween ship and shore would be severed, for the girl had reached the limit of her strength. Bidding a hasty good-bye to her parents she stumbled blindly up the gangway and no sooner had she put foot on deck than the great vessel began, almost imperceptibly at first, to move away from the pier. She leaned against the rail and waved a handkerchief in the general direction of the spot where her loved ones stood. Through blurred eyes she could barely dis- tinguish their outlines. Long she stood there, silently weeping and gripping an iron up- right with such intensity that when she finally removed her cramped hand it took some of the paint with it. How could the sun shine amid so much darkness? It seemed sinful. The Maui passed the Golden Gate and into the ocean. Then she murmured brokenly, "Farewell America, good-bye Father, Mother, Nate, good-bye home and hope." With unsteady steps she went to her cabin. D. KJRING all of the first day Nell's eyes were too red The Improvement Era for September, 1930 735 and swollen to admit of her ap- pearing on deck or in the dining salon. She therefore remained in her cabin. Many hours were spent in a futile attempt to revive shad- owy memories of her real parents. The features of a quiet, grave man whose dim image was tall and who was kind and tender could not be recalled. From childhood, memory of her mother had been somewhat clear; the dark hair and eyes had seemed exquisitely beauti- ful; but now this mental picture was inexpressibly ugly. The hair instead of being wavy was kinky, and the woman's smile, which she had remembered as something at- tractive, and indeed had tried to imitate, was now a repulsive grin, emanating from thick, sensuous lips. Without mercy she stripped from the form, which memory and imagination had cre- ated, every vestige of beauty and left of it nothing but a coarse negro wench. She, Lilly Nell Redfield, pronounced the most attractive girl in her home city and modestly proud of the fact, had been given life by such a creature; from such flesh and blood had she come. Besides these dim recollections of her parents, she could confus- edly remember the terror of the people during the disastrous storm which had wrecked their home and killed her father and mother. Also in her mind was a picture of the great warships lying wrecked on the rocks of the harbor. They had passed close by them as she was leaving Apia for the United States with her newly acquired parents. There were other formless images, people whom it seemed she knew well, but memory, though tanta- lizing her with promises of ex- cursions refused to conduct her into the details of their names and lives. 1 HE only incident of the homeward journey which could be revived was her delight and excitement at the myriads of flying fish emerging like clouds of silver from the water, as Mr. and Mrs. Redfield held her at the rail of the vessel. One of these, she re- membered, had landed on the deck, and she was inconsolable because the cat had eaten it before it could be rescued. Before entering upon this pres- ent journey, she had, in consulta- tion with her father, decided that a stay of a few weeks in the Ha- waiian Islands would be advisable. It was thought that acquaintance with the more modernized natives of that group would make the transition from her past life to the one which awaited her less abrupt than it otherwise would be. A VIOLENT attack of sea-sickness, added to her men- tal troubles, made Nell wish most devoutly that the boat would go to the bottom, and right speedily. That fate seemed to her inevitable. No ship could weather such a sea, and therefore the sooner this wretched internal turmoil ceased the better. For twenty-four hours she was glad she was not on her honeymoon. It would be terrible to be as ill as this with a husband looking pn, lor perhaps equally afflicted. However, unbelievable as it seemed to her, sea-sickness always comes to an end. She awoke early on the morning of the third day out with the feeling that the fresh air would prove a wholesome stim- ulant. However, she had but little confidence in her ability as a sailor and decided to go on deck while a majority of the passengers still slept, so that there would be few if any observers in the event that the dreaded malady again overcame her. A """ '"'■■■"' ;^£!Sy;--!vl,: ■',.'.' : Judge and Mrs. Redfield STIFF breeze, well laden with salty spray, was blow- ing, and this made Nell duck her head as she came on the port side of the vessel. Suddenly she bump- ed into a man who, instead of I "Left of it nothing but a coarse negro wench." apologizing, seized her in his arms and kissed her time and time again. One upward look and the aston- ished girl no longer tried to tear herself away from the embrace. She was in Nate's arms and, weakened by her mental and phys- ical ills, had real need of support. They clung to each other as though each feared another immediate sep- aration impended. "Forgive me, Nell, for frighten- ing you so," he pleaded at last. "Oh Nate, what are you doing here? I thought you had gone to New York." "What a contemptible cad I'd be to let you go off alone to that accursed land. I'm going with you and see that you are properly located. Then if you insist, I'll come back." "Nate, can't you understand? You are making it so much harder for me." "Harder? Why, I'm only trying to make it easier." "But we went over that so many times at home. I know, and Father and Mother unwilling- ly agree that my plan is the only sane one." Ti HE rocking vessel made it necessary for them to lean against the rail for support. He held her hand and kissed it when- ever the backs of the few early risers were turned. "Listen to me, sweetheart. I'm aboard the boat and can't leave it without committing suicide be- fore we reach Honolulu. I know all your arguments, but in spite (Continued on page 780)