--- title: Improvement Era description: Monthly periodical of the Mormon church, 1897 onward. This library holds the issues of November 1897 to December 1930. authors: - Brimhall, George H. collections: - periodicals tags: - magazine - improvement-era periodical: Improvement Era volume: 26 number: 6 published: 1923-04 publisher: Young Men’s Mutual Improvement Associations publisher_place: Salt Lake City language: en type: magazine reference: 'George H. Brimhall, "Doing Common Things in an Uncommon Way", *Improvement Era* 26, no. 6 (April 1923): 531–537.' source: url: https://archive.org/details/improvementera2606unse transcription: Transcribed from the Internet Archive scan of each issue (the item for each issue is named in the issue's own source); unnumbered advertising leaves are omitted, printed page numbers are kept as page markers. identifier: improvementera2606unse start_page: 531 end_page: 537 rights: status: public-domain basis: US publication 1930 or earlier (published 1923-04) source: https://archive.org/details/improvementera2606unse publication_year: 1923 note: The Internet Archive item metadata carries a blanket "© Copyright by Intellectual Reserve, Inc." notice. The library owner judged it inapplicable because this issue was published in 1923, before 1931; a scan-level notice does not restore copyright. --- # Doing Common Things in an Uncommon Way Doing Common Things in an Uncommon Way A Study for the Advanced Senior Class M. I. A., 1822-23 By Dr. George H. Brimliall, President Emeritus, Brigham Young University LESSON XXII— THE HOST Reference Reading: — Why I Stopped Being Too Hospitable.^ American Magazine, February; Ten Things to Keep Us Apart. — American Maga- zine, for March. 1. Being Host. "It is more blessed to give than to receive," and by the same principle it is a greater privilege to be a host than it is to be a guest. It affords a greater opportunity for giving. Whether or not a host is rewarded depends upon his ability to be a successful host and upon his guest. The question is, what are the elements which contribute to the success of a host? The answer is that they are the same identical elements which are contributary to greatness in general. 2. Essential Accomodations. The essential requirements to be a good host are: (a) congenial physical accomodations looking to the physical comfort of the guest; (b) congenial personal accomodations looking to the mental comfort of the guest. The first of these requirements is relatively of little importance aside from the fact that a host should not entertain or be expected to entertain beyond the point where the expense and extra work involved become a hardship or entails a sacrifice of essentials. Many people become financially embarrassed through furnishing hospitality and being a "good fellow." A "good fellow" very often impoverishes his guests as well as himself. The law of compensation applies even to cases of hospitality, which is a very profitable thing to be* remembered especially by hosts who are in- clined to be big hearted and over generous. The latter requirement, congenial personal accommodations, depends upon the host's social ability which is linked up with personal magnetism, cordiality, self-sacrifice and many other well known qualities, as well as qualities which the human mind has not yet accounted for. 3. Social Usage. Social etiquette is one aid to social ability. The social rules of good society covering such things as invitations, how to dress, how to set the table and etc., may be obtained from any good book on social usage. It is surprising the number of people who fail to ob- serve proper procedure in so common a thing as introducing guests. A knowledge of such details inspires a host with confidence and poise and avoids gross social blunders which may reflect in an uncomplimentary way on a host. Whether social usage should be followed or not largely 532 IMPROVEMENT ERA depends upon who the guests are, and upon the object of entertainment or hospitality. 4. Versatility Desirable. Versatility is desirable in this connection be- cause occasions arise where the use of social etiquette may be a source of embarrassment to the guests. The appropriate thing, therefore, is to em- ploy the most refined etiquette that the guests can really accustom them- selves to without feeling ill at east. One time when King Edward was the host of some of the peasantry, he observed an elderly man drinking tea from his saucer. In order to appear ordinary, and to avoid the possibility of embarrassing his less polished guests, King Edward also sipped his tea from his saucer. JESUS AS HOST That the matchless Examplar was an entertainer we have ample evi- dence even from the meagre history of his peerless life. 1. The Marriage Feast. The record of the wedding feast contains proof that divine spiritual power may be used as a factor of happiness in entertainments. It was an uncommon wedding in at least one, and probably more than one, particular. The innovation from a general custom was one that elicited commendation of the bridegroom by the master of cere- monies, or director of the festivities. The procedure eliminated all deceit and placed the stamp of genuinity on the whole affair. John 2.1-10. As to whether Jesus was the chief host at this event may be questioned, but as to his officially aiding is quite evident. 2. The Dinner by the Seaside. The Master entertained five thousand on the grassy shores of the Sea of Galilee. There is no question about his being host at that plenteous affair. He| delegated the details of the service to his disciples, but behind it all he was the great provider and organizer and indirect executor. The event left the lesson: (a) Give thanks before eating, (b) With Christian distribution, "There is enough for all and to share." (c) "Let nothing be wasted," John 6:1, 13. 3. Luncheon for Five Thousand* On this occasion Jesus declared his appreciation of the physical needs of the truth-seeking throng and con- fessed his compassion for them. He assumed the responsibility of host to a multitude needing and meriting refreshments. His manifest solicitude was an index to what every host should feel and his orderly procedure was an example of perfect self reliance. Again was taught in action the lessons, "Ask a blessing before eating," and "Waste not." 4. The Sacramental Supper. The Sacramental supper from the stand- point of importance, has no equal in history. It substituted the old pass- over. The covenant of action, there made, was to be repeated by the sacra- ment. Service of the twelve and of the believers in the Redeemer of the world, "Lest they forget, lest they forget." How he loved humanity — what he did for them and how they "may always have his Spirit to be with them." Matt. 26:17, 30; Mark 14:12, 23; Luke 22:8,23. DOING COMMON THINGS IN AN UNCOMMON WAY 535 Questions and Problems 1. What two essential accommodations are required of a good host? 2. Why does being a "good fellow" often impoverish the guests a* well as the host? 3. How does a familiarity with social etiquette assist a host? Should it always be employed? 4. Why is versatility desirable? 5. Under what circumstances should the best social usage be varied from? 6. Name two features that characterized the entertainment at which Jesus was host that are uncommon in the entertainments of today in the world. 7. Show that the sacrament of the Lord's supper as we observe it is a covenant and testimony in reverential action. 8. In what entertainment at which Jesus was host was singing a part of the program? 9. Show the educative elements in the entertainments where Jesus was host. 10. Tell of Edward Bok's uncommon efforts for the encouragement of good music. Chapter 32, large book. LESSON XXIII— THE GUEST 1. Sustain Common Interest. There usually exists some common interest between a host and a guest. The thing for the guest to do is to sustain that common interest. If the guest is not already fully acquainted with the host, he should study him and try to become acquainted with his likes and dislikes and hobbies and habits of thought and living. a. Social Etiquette. Some people are given to being stiff and formal and inclined to place a high value on proper social etiquette or they may have peculiar ideas of their own about the best social usage and about the way a household should be conducted. It is advisable under these cir- cumstances for the guest to conduct himself in accordance with the dictates of proper social customs, or adjust his manners, as soon as possible, to conform to the special peculiarities of the host. A guest will attract favorable attention by outdoing his host in respect to etiquette. A ludicrous incident is reported about M. Jusserand, French Ambas- sador to the United States, during Roosevelt's administration. M. Jusser- and was Roosevelt's guest one day and the two went for a long walk in the woods. A stream, which was too wide for them to jump across lay in their course, so Roosevelt pulled off his khaki clothes and waded across it. After recovering from his surprise, Jusserand, who was more formally clad, stripped off the necessary clothing but he left on his gloves. The thought is implied that he felt etiquette required him to keep on his gloves in the presence of the Chief Executive of the United States even though both were trouserless. It is easy to imagine how unfavorable the host's impression was in this particular case. This illustrates how much some people make of social etiquette, and also, how it reacts to a guest's disadvantage not to be able to readily adjust to a host's Individual social standards. 534 IMPROVEMENT ERA b. Sociability vs. Indifference, If it is observed that the host is inclined to be informal and free, the guest should respond by trying to outdo his host in this resjtect and still observe those particular refinements of manner that are the mark of a well-bred man or woman. If a guest is not free and sociable when his host is, his lack of sociability may be inter- preted as being due to dissatisfaction or indifference or even to stupidity. It may even appear to be uncomplimentary to the host. 2. The Sensitive Cord. There are some big, generous hearted hosts who make us feel so welcome that a guest is apt to get the idea that nothing is desired so much as his company. Such hosts are found In both the larger and smaller communities, but the generosity of the smaller com- munities strikes the most sensitive cord. These hosts are easily and fre- quently imposed upon. Other common and very generous hosts with many guests are: the public school system, the Church school system, and the Church auxiliary organizations. 3. Active Gratitude Fundamental. Guests should always bear in mind one fundamental requirement, "that where a host has bestowed hos- pitality the man who accepts it must; be content to accept it merely as charity unless he returns"* a similar hospitality or an equivalent in the shape of active gratitude. The gratitude implied here is not the kind that is merely an evidence of past favors received and future favors hoped fof, but is genuine unselfish gratitude accompanied by an ardent desire to give at least value received. 4. A Desirable Guest. The following carries the suggestion of what you should be like in order to be a desirable and welcome guest: a. Are we the kind of a guest we would like to entertain, and have we a strong inward feeling radiating gratitude, and a determination to return an equivalent for the hospitality we receive, or are we the kind of a guest who impoverishes our host and entertains no thought of compensation? b. Are we the kind of a guest who can profitably entertain our host, or do we require the constant time, attention and entertainment of our host? c. Are we the kind of a guest who is as welcome in the attic or kitchen as in the living room, and can be served breakfast on the kitchen table, or are we the kind of a man who requires the most comfort- able bed in the host's house and then complains? d. Are we the kind of guests who see some good in everyone and can pay a justified compliment, or are we indifferent to the amount of extra work and trouble we entail and the sigh of relief our host gives when we leave? We should all hold an earnest session with ourselves and see which of the suggestions above fit our particular case, and how we can improve our ability to become ever welcome guests. '"Roosevelt used this language in speaking of public school education. DOING COMMON THINGS IN AN UNCOMMON WAY 535 Questions and Problems 1. Why should a guest observe the social etiquette of his host? 2. How should a guest conduct himself around an informal host? 3. Why should a guest maintain the particular refinements becoming a well-bred man or woman even at the sacrifice of congeniality? 4. How flexible was the etiquette of the late Theodore Roosevelt as compared to that of most European diplomats? 5. Which would you prefer, to be the guest in an urban or a rural home? 6. Explain why we are all guests of the public schools, the churches and the auxiliary organizations. 7. When is gratitude merely evidence of past favors received and future favors hoped for? 8. Name some of the qualities of a desirable guest. 9. What well-known Biblical characters was Christ the Guest of? 10. Discuss the Golden Rule obligation of a guest in regard to adverse criticism of the host or the entertainment. 11. Tell of Edward Bolt's failure as a dance-craze reformer and dis- cuss page 386, Americanization of Edward Bok. 12. Jesus as a Guest: a. At the home of Martha, Luke 7:38; b. at the triumphal entry into Jerusalem, Mark 11:6-12; c. at the seaside after his resurrection, Luke 24:3643. LESSON XXXIV— OUTINGS 1. Outings Uplifting. Outings are an important avenue to educa- tional, spiritual and physical exhilaration and advancement. At the aver- age social or dance, people, young and old, have a tendency to gather in cliques and crowds and thus obstruct a free intercourse of feelings and personal contact. An outing, on the other hand, affords a better opportunity and creates a tendency for people to mingle more freely. The atmosphere and surroundings of the great outdoors are usually such as to exhilarate and respond to the Holy Spirit. This conclusion is exemplified by reference to some of the earlier outings of the Latter-day Saints. 2. Feasting and Companionship. The most outstanding outings of the early settlers are the Twenty-fourth of July celebrations of 1856 and 1857. On these occasions a large number of Saints led by the modern Prophet Brigham Young, journeyed up to the head of Big Cottonwood canyon to celebrate the anniversary of the arrival of the Saints in Salt Lake valley. The outing in the year 1857, celebrating the tenth anniversay of the arrival, has a great historical significance because on the second day of this outing, the startling and unexepected word came that Johnston's Army was on its way to Utah to annihilate the "Mormons."' It is doubtful if a more dramatic and yet advantageous time from the standpoint of the Saints could have been picked to break such discouraging news. After two days of feasting on the companionship of one another, and on one of Nature's great works 8,000 feet above sea level, the Saints were undoubtedly inspired with a spirit of unity and faith which enabled them to bear the disappointment with determination and fortitude. At this celebration there were present nearly twenty-six hundred people, five hundred vehicles, and about fifteen hundred animals comprising horses, mules, oxen and cows. A military 536 IMPROVEMENT ERA complement and six bands were also present to add zest to the spirit of the occa«jon.* Refuge was sought in the tops of Zion's mountains so the minds of the Saints would be unobstructed by the ordinary rigors of work-day problems and surroundings. Everything was conducive to a re- ceptive attitude of partaking of the beautiful things of life and nature and the Holy Spirit. 3. Spiritual Feasts. These outings, therefore, became spiritual feasts characterized by outward expressions of gratitude and thanksgiving for ths freedom the Saints had enjoyed for ten years in the promised land. These occasions vividly recalled to the minds of the Latter-day Saints the promises of the Lord, his great accomplishments through their instrumentality and his reward for faithful effort. Such outings "recreate" in the fullest sense. In and of themselves, they righteously expand and elevate the mind and body and soul, not only of each individual present but of the entire group as a unit. 4. Blessings and Responsibilities Added Upon. In this generation we have the same blessings to be thankful for that the early settlers, our bene- factors had, and in addition, we have those blessings added upon which have also brought responsibilities added upon. Our gratitude can be featured in our present-day outings as profitably as it was in the pioneer days. 5. Central Theme for Outings. It is an essential feature for all outings and celebrations to carry out some well defined purpose or central thought; otherwise a valuable educational opportunity is being passed up. For instance, on a Twenty-fourth of July outing, the central aim can be a review of incidents surrounding the entrance of the pioneers into Salt Lake valley. This thought can be carried out and sustained by the music, the speeches and the games, in short throughout the entire celebration. For the following Twenty-fourth, the history of the activities and hardships of the pioneers immediately following their arrival can be made the central thought. Or we need not confine our theme wholly to history, we may use any spiritual thought or idea. Some such idea can be extended to the Fathers and Sons' and Mothers and Daughters' outings, the Sunday school picnics and Mutual outings. Or, it may be well, in these cases, to adopt a patriotic, moral, social or spiritual idea as the central theme. This plan need not detract from the recreational part of the outing. The games in most cases can be so designed or modified as to incorporate and sustain the main theme of the outing. By this means outings are made highly instructive as well as recreational and interesting. They also afford a very practical means t>f solving some of our social problems be- cause we get collective effort at work which makes small problems out of large problems. After playing games, eating and rubbing elbows with other fathers and other fathers' sons, on one of their regular outings, what father or son *See History of Utah, by O. F. Whitney, Chap. 29. Also John Steven's Courtship, by Susa Young Gates. DOING COMMON THINGS IN AN UNCOMMON WAY 537 could return home without having a higher regard for his rellow breth- ren or without being benefited in various other ways? What girl could be so indifferent to morning and evening prayer, the reading of good books, proper diet, and proper exercise as to not participate in them at the Y. L. M. I. A. outings? After living in such environment for a few days, what girls could be so indifferent to these things that she would return home from such an outing without being uplifted? Questions and Problems 1. Why do outings afford a better opportunity for social intercourse than most entertainments? 2. Why is the great outdoors conducive to greater exhilaration than the indoors? 4. Describe the Twenty-fourth of July celebrations of 1857, at the head of Big Cottonwood Canyon. 4. Why would the Saints be especially grateful on this occasion? 5. How do you think the Saints felt after receiving word concerning Johnston's Army? 6. Name some of the regular summer outings of the Church organ- izations. 7. Why are outings educational? 8. Why are outings conducive to a better cooperative spirit in a com- munity? 9. Discuss this proposition: Sunday outings are essentially character- ized by a spirit of recklessness, (a) Organization and organized plans are missing in planning them, (b) Organization is lacking in carrying them out. 10. Discuss the four-fold value of an elevative outing: (a) The ex- pectancy of it. (b) The preparation for it. (c) The enjoyment of it. (4) The remembrance of it. 11. In what praticulars did America fail with l!ok. chap. 38. (The End) My Baby I'm- gazed on the faces of monarchs great, I've seen great rulers and potentates; But the greatest face beneath the sun, To me is the face of my new-born son. I've felt the thrill of achieved success, I've thrilled at the touch of love's caress; But the " thrillingest" thrill I ever knew Was when I heard my firstborn "coo." I've known great wealth and have known great fame, I've thrilled at the sound of praise and acclaim. But the happiest moment I ever had, Was when my first-born murmured, "Dad." Clifton, Idaho O. E. Howell