--- title: Improvement Era description: Monthly periodical of the Mormon church, 1897 onward. This library holds the issues of November 1897 to December 1930. authors: - Dean, J. H. collections: - periodicals tags: - magazine - improvement-era periodical: Improvement Era volume: 18 number: 7 published: 1915-05 publisher: Young Men’s Mutual Improvement Associations publisher_place: Salt Lake City language: en type: magazine reference: 'J. H. Dean, "The Secret of Successful Presiding," *Improvement Era* 18, no. 7 (May 1915): 605–610.' source: url: https://archive.org/details/improvementera1807unse transcription: Transcribed from the Internet Archive scan of each issue (the item for each issue is named in the issue's own source); unnumbered advertising leaves are omitted, printed page numbers are kept as page markers. identifier: improvementera1807unse start_page: 605 end_page: 610 rights: status: public-domain basis: US publication 1930 or earlier (published 1915-05) source: https://archive.org/details/improvementera1807unse publication_year: 1915 note: The Internet Archive item metadata carries a blanket "© Copyright by Intellectual Reserve, Inc." notice. The library owner judged it inapplicable because this issue was published in 1915, before 1931; a scan-level notice does not restore copyright. --- # The Secret of Successful Presiding The Secret of Successful Presiding BY J. H. DEAN When one is called to any position of presidency, in the Church, about the first feeling that enters the heart is, How may I gain and keep the love, respect and confidence of those over whom I have been called to preside? Throughout a somewhat lengthy and varied experience, the writer has made a study of the reasons why some succeed in this and others fail, and herewith offers some of his conclusions in the hope that presiding officers, especially in the auxiliary organiza- tions of the Church, may find something that will be of help to them in solving this most important problem. The scriptures say, "As with the priest so with the people," and experience has taught me that, as the Sunday school super- intendent, so with the Sunday school, as with the M. I. A. presi- dent and officers, so with the members. As with the Relief Society president, so with the society. As with the bishop, so with his ward. As with the teacher, so with the class, and so on through- out all the organizations of the Church. An intelligent, bright woman was chosen to be president of a Relief society. She attended all her meetings, was faithful in tithes and offerings, charitable to the poor, always remembered her prayers, and taught her family to keep the Word of Wisdom, but she did' not keep it herself. She was a confirmed tea drinker. One day she was sure she smelled tobacco when her sixteen year son Alfred came into the house. She led him into another old. room and shut the door and, feeling in his pocket, found a sack of tobacco and cigarette papers. He admitted that he had been smok- ing for nearly two years. In her alarm the mother questioned him severely and found that he took a glass of beer quite fre- drank coffee whenever was offered him. quently, and it "And why shouldn't I, mother? You drink your tea, is it any worse for me than for you, to do these things She was surprised to hear from him that her daugther Jane ' drank tea, though she took it on the "sly." "And I tell you. mother," said the son, "all the ward knows the street. They you drink tea, for the boys threw it up to me on you a hypocrite, and they say that "have heard their mothers calling drink tea so can they. ifyou, the Relief society president, can And they are doing it." He called his sister Jane and made her every time her mother did, and she admit that she drank tea ! also claimed the same right. The only thing- she was ashamed of was that she had "sneaked it" in the pantry. The mother was thunderstruck and a deadly fear almost ! deprived her of speech. All her life, when any dreadful calamity threatened her, she had appealed to the Lord for help, and that was the first thought in her mind now. She asked her children to kneel with her in prayer. But the son said he didn't feel like praying. "What's the use of praying, mother? You say you can't quit your tea, and I am sure I don't want to give up my tobacco and coffee, and I tell you what's what, mother, from now on I am not going to be a 'sneak !' If you are going to have your tea, I want my coffee, and I'll think more of Jane if, instead of drinking her tea on the 'sly' in the pantry, she will take it at the table with her mother. If we can't keep the Word of Wisdom, mother, let's quit being pretenders, anyway.' And he picked up his tobacco sack and was about to quit the room. His mother begged him to wait a minute. Was it possible her cup f tea was bringing all these dire calamities upon her That th; sisters of the Relief society were drinking tea because she did ! That she was spoken of in the street as a hypocrite She ! felt sure now that this was why she had so little influence among the sisters; and maybe, already, she had lost control of her chil- dren. She took her son and daughter in her arms, and said, "Children ! I see that I am the transgressor in these things. I have always thought I couldn't do without my tea, but now I covenant with you, in the most solemn manner, that I will never taste another drop as long as I live. Now, will you not make the same covenant with me?" The children's hearts were softened, in a moment, and the son said, "Now mother, you're talking. You're right, I'll make the same covenant, and so will Jane, won't you, Jane?" fane who was sobbing on her mother's shoulder nodded her head, and the mother and children wept together. "And now, mother," said Alfred, as soon as they had dried their tears, "I can't taper off, let's quit right here and now. Get your tea and here's my tobacco. Let's put them in the stove to- gether." And they did so, and Jane, to show her good will got a hammer and smashed the tea pot. This Relief society president, at the next society testimony meeting, told her experiences to her sisters. She confessed that she had set them an evil example, and asked to be forgiven. She asked how many of them knew she was a breaker of the Word of Wisdom, and she was surprised when every hand went up. Then she tremblingly asked how many adopted this habit on account of her evd example, and her knees smote together when five of her sisters stood up. "Well, sisters," she said, "it's plain to me that I am unworthy to be your president, and I shall hand in my resignation to the bishop. I realize that what I have done is past recall, but if you will tell me anything- 1 can do to help to make amends, I will surely do it." One Scotch sister jumped up and said, "I dinna ken why ye should resign, ye are more worthy now, to be our president than ever before." And the other sisters followed in the same strain, and though this sister felt she should lay down her presidency, yet, by the advice of those over her, and the unanimous voice of the sisters of the society, she still presides over them. And her society is one of the best in the Church. That sister has found the secret of successful presidency. Now, instead of being called a hypocrite, her humble repentance and reformation, have given her an influence for good with every member of the ward. And the parents who are trying to bring up their children aright, feel that her example is a tower of strength to help them. When the subject of the Word of Wisdom is mentioned in her presence, she doesn't quake and feel conscious- stricken as she used to, but she can throw all her- influence and power on the side of the word of the Lord. At the dedication of one of our temples where none were ad- mitted unless they had a card of invitation signed by the president of the Church, a small boy presented himself for admission. He had no card, but he claimed he had a right to go in, for he had helped to build the temple. Elder John Henry Smith, of the quorum of the Twelve, was close at hand and the door-keeper referred the matter to him. Elder Smith took the child to one side and, in his kind, fatherly way, listened to his story. He if they said his Sunday school teacher had told his class, that water and such like things for would deny themselves candy, soda together their nickels, dimes and quarters, she one year, and put one thought they would have sufficient to pay for the cutting of stone in the temple, and then they would have a right to go into the House of the Lord, for they had helped to build it. And they fellow in his arms and had done so. Elder Smith took the little said, "God bless you, my little man !You shall go in ! Many big- cards, can t ger 'persons than you, though they have admission to'build the House of the Lord." say that they have helped of a deacons' can imagine that boy a fine manly president I quorum— one who will do things! One who will be a leader, and have an influence for good wherever he goes. And there is crying need for such Sunday school teachers as this little man had, who results from then- have faith and influence enough to get practical such a teacher lived her classes. We don't need to be told that would have suf- religion and was "true blue." No other kind ficicnt inspiration and influence with a class of innocent children to get them to make such a sacrifice. A Sunday school superintendent was spending the clay at a pleasure resort. He was invited by some friends who were eating their dinner, to join them. During the meal some bottles of beer were opened, and a glass was offered to him. He was about to take it, when he saw a little girl belonging to his Sunday school off at a little distance watching him, so he declined the beer. "Oh take a glass," said his friend, "it won't hurt you. Look at your Church members all around you drinking it, are you better than they? There are lots worse things than taking a glass of beer." He again glanced at the little child. Her eyes were still fixed upon him and he said, "No thanks, I don't drink beer." He felt like he wanted to be alone and got up and walked away. The little girl ran after him and took hold of his hand and looking up lovingly into his face said, "Bro. 1 was watching you over there at that table, / knew our Sunday school superintendent wouldn't drink beer." He glanced at her in a frightened way, fearing she had read his thought but no, she ; had given him. full credit, in her childish heart, for having refused the beer, because it was wrong to drink it. She didn't know that if it hadn't been for her innocent eyes he would have drunk it. After she had left him he sought a secluded place where he couldn't be seen and removing his hat asked his heavenly Father to forgive his unworthiness, and solemnly covenanted that, henceforth, he would be worthy the love and confidence of an innocent child. But suppose he had drunk that glass of beer? It only cost five-cents, and his friend would have paid that. But, what would have been his loss? What would have been the consequences to that little child ? What would the harvest be ? Who can estimate it? Where would the consequence end? And what a tragedy would have taken place in the heart of that little child. "Tragedy" is none too strong a word. What is more beautiful than the love and confidence that beams from the countenances of little children for whom they love? Parents know what it looks like, and if the officers and teachers of our auxiliary organizations haven't seen it in the faces of those over whom they preside and teach, it is because they haven't desired it. I have never seen an angel, but if an angel's face can show anything more heart-satisfying, soul- inspiring, and wonderful, it must be beautiful indeed. Well isn't anything that destroys this sweet, chidlish confidence and in its place plants suspicion and doubt, an awful tragedy? I wonder how many such tragedies are happening every week in our homes and associations and cities! Isn't that the offense the Lord means when he says "Who shall offend one of these little ones that be- : lieve in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depths of the sea." The offense that merits such a punishment must be as serious and vital as death itself. And why shouldn't our lives be blotted out if our example tends to evil, and to pull down and destroy the souls of our fellows? "Well, but," says one, "the drinking of a cup of tea or coffee or beer, or the smoking of tobacco are such small offenses. Is that true? Is anything that is wrong small or insignificant? Is one less a thief who steals a dollar than who steals a thousand? It's the offense that is the crime, not the amount. Would it have been a small thing if the usefulness and influence for good of that superintendent had been destroyed? Yet that is just what would have happened, had he drunk that glass of beer. That little girl, in her sorrow and disappointment, would have told her classmates and her family, and in a short time it would have been known throughout the whole ward. It is considered a very proper and reasonable thing for a victorious army to take for their own use the flocks and herds of their enemies, but when Saul, King of Israel, took those of the Amalekites, cost him his kingdom, for the Lord had commanded him to destroy every living thing. The sin was in the disobedience. It would not lower the Pope of Rome, or the President of the United States very much in our estimation if they smoked their cigars or pipes, but if President Joseph F. Smith should do such a thing, it would shake the Church to its very foundation. Even the smokers in the Church would be heartbroken and wonder how in the world he could do such a thing. Yet hasn't he as good a right to indulge in these things as we have? Isn't our influence and example as potent for good or evil in our sphere as his in his sphere? Haven't we made the same covenant? Are we not under the same law? Tea, coffee, tobacco and liquor are just as harmful to the world as to us, so far as the body is concerned, but we come under a condemnation that doesn't apply to them, for the Lord has told us that these things are not good, and has commandedus to refrain from them. And we are under covenant to keep his command- ments. When we indulge in these things, we suffer a moral degra- dation as well as a phvsical hurt. We are covenant-breakers, and feel self-condemned. Non-"Mormons" can partake of these things and will retain the respect and confidence of their wives and chil- dren and associates, for with them it is merely a habit or "weak- ness." But when we do these things, we are stripped of our power and influence for good among the people. Even the non- "Mormons" think less of us, for thev know that we claim to live above these things. In addition to the injury to the body which others as well as we receive, we violate our consciences. A per- and smothers the voice of con- son who persistently violates directions. He is science weakens his powers to resist evil in other olO IMPROVEMENT ERA a moral coward. He knows what is right but refuses to do it. He lowers the flag of his high ideals. Such a one doesn't need the day of judgment to condemn him ; he is condemned already. Arethese small things? It's a small thing for a cow to kick over a lamp, and yet such an insignificant accident burned up the great city of Chicago. No wonder that when Relief society officers, Sunday school superintendents, M. I. A. presidents, Sun- day school and other teachers are guilty of these small offenses that they lose the influence and power necessary to make them success- ful in their work. There is a growing sentiment throughout the Church that in order to be a successful presiding officer, one must be a strong personality, magnetic, educated, fine-looking, well dressed, and not a "moss-back." He must in short be "up-to-date." And that is true. It is a pleasure to look upon such a one. A great evil among us today is mental laziness. So many of us are "back numbers." Some one has paraphrased Maud Muller: "Of all sad words of tongue or pen, — The saddest are these He's a has-been." Put there are a few small things that are additionally neces- sary. He must be virtuous and humble and prayerful. He must be true to his covenants. He must be true to his brethren. He must sus- tain and speak well of those who are over him, and thereby prove that he is worthy the love and support of those over whom he pre- sides. Fie must keep the Sabbath day holy. He must keep his body free from anything that would defile it. But why particularize ? Let us cover the whole ground in one sentence, he must be a genuine Latter-day Saint. One who is lacking in these, may please the eye, tickle the ear, and even instruct the mind, but he imll leave our hearts cold and hungry. The Saints are hungry for heart-food, and any presiding officer or speaker or singer who can touch their hearts and fill their eyes with tears, has a wonderful and marvelous power, and is always listened to with grateful attention. When we find presiding officers who have been faithful, who have clean records behind them who, notwithstanding their weak- ; nesses and shortcomings, (and they will have plenty of them) have nevertheless lived pure, consistent lives, when thev speak there is a light in the eye, an inspiration and a ring to the voice, and a convincing power and demonstration of the spirit, that the un- faithful and thr unclean are not entitled to and do not possess. Verily: "It is the Spirit that giveth life." Such presiding officers have found the secret of successful presiding. KT'DMESA, COLO.