--- title: Improvement Era description: Monthly periodical of the Mormon church, 1897 onward. This library holds the issues of November 1897 to December 1930. authors: - Taylor, Joseph E. collections: - periodicals tags: - magazine - improvement-era periodical: Improvement Era volume: 6 number: 7 published: 1903-05 publisher: Young Men’s Mutual Improvement Associations publisher_place: Salt Lake City language: en type: magazine reference: 'Joseph E. Taylor, "Courtship and Marriage," *Improvement Era* 6, no. 7 (May 1903): 532–536.' source: url: https://archive.org/details/improvementera0607unse transcription: Transcribed from the Internet Archive scan of each issue (the item for each issue is named in the issue's own source); unnumbered advertising leaves are omitted, printed page numbers are kept as page markers. identifier: improvementera0607unse start_page: 532 end_page: 536 rights: status: public-domain basis: US publication 1930 or earlier (published 1903-05) source: https://archive.org/details/improvementera0607unse publication_year: 1903 note: The Internet Archive item metadata carries a blanket "© Copyright by Intellectual Reserve, Inc." notice. The library owner judged it inapplicable because this issue was published in 1903, before 1931; a scan-level notice does not restore copyright. --- # Courtship and Marriage COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE. BY JOSEPH E. TAYLOR, OF THE PRESIDENCY OF THE SALT LAKE". STAKE OF ZION. We come now to that period called courtship which generally follows attachment or a partial engagement. This was not in- dulged in nor allowed among the Israelites, in ancient times, to the extent that it is today. There is no question that the surveil- ance which was exercised by Jewish parents, over their daughters especially, even after betrothal, largely prevented the commital of those wrongs which are far too frequent now-a-days. While we are fully convinced that less latitude, in this regard, would be the safer and wiser course, yet no suggestion or argu- ment of ours, however forcibly presented, would materialy change what might be termed a time-honored custom. Consequently, we are compelled to consider this subject from its present status or condition. It was from this standpoint that Goldsmith says of this peculiar period: "There is something excessively fair and open in this method of courtship: by this, both sides are prepared for all the matrimonial adventures that are to follow." A great deal of what is called courtship is merely a flirtation with no serious object in view. This is unwise, also dangerous, and should be avoided always. It is during the period of genuine courtship that lovers imagine that the goal of human happiness is reached, that heaven has come to earth. Material things are, for a time, almost forgotten, and the loving couple abandon themselves in thought and feeling to a blissful felicity, which only a stern, cold, cruel world can disturb. After awhile, however, they awake from their blissful slum-^ bers, and find themselves compelled to give some attention to mat- COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE. §33 ters terrestrial. For, while they feel that heaven is here, earth demands its share of consideration, which is by no means a small one. Having mutually agreed to become husband and wife, they set about making preparations for the "coming event" which will unite in one, two loving souls. As viewed from a worldly standpoint, marriage is merely a civil contract, and ends with death. But viewed from our stand- point, it means a compact entered into between a man and woman, •stamped with the seal of heaven, to last, not only through time, but throughout eternity. We are informed that a record of every ordinance of mar- riage performed by God's priesthood in holy temples is kept in heaven. The reason for this is obvious. Heaven is a party to the contract, and, therefore, makes record of this as well as all other things in which it is concerned. Whatever is done in the name of the Lord (and as the holy priesthood can only act in that name and by that authority) our Father is pleased to recognize and sus- tain. Consequently, a record of the sacred ordinance of marriage, involving, as it does, consequences of the highest importance in this life, and which reach, as we have said, into eternity, should be preserved in the heavenly archives. Bye and bye, the portals to celestial glory will be opened, and we can readily imagine that the heavenly records will first be consulted as to the eligibility of each and every individual who desires to pass the guards who are sta- tioned there. For the flaming sword and the cherubim still keep the way of the "tree of life." Marriage was instituted and ordained for a specific purpose. The union of our father Adam and our mother Eve was made com- plete by a special blessing, in which was the command to "be fruit- ful and multiply and replenish the earth." After the deluge, when the peopling of the earth depended upon Noah and his sons, the Lord repeated what he had said to Adam in these words: "And •God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them: Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth." Unquestionably, this has been implied if not repeated whenever a duly authorized servant of the Lord has performed the sacred ordinance of marriage, thus following the pattern given in the days of Adam and Noah. Not only was man blessed that he might be fruitful in the earth, bat 534 IMPROVEMENT ERA. the beasts, the fishes and the fowls also, were blessed by God for that very purpose. (Gen. 1: 20-25; 8: 15-17.) While Lehi was encamped in the wilderness with his sons, God commanded him to send back to Jerusalem and bring Ishmael and his family, in which were several daughters, in order that the sons of Lehi, as well as Zoram, the captive, might be provided with wives, for the express purpose of peopling the land of promise, (America) to which they were going. Such was the wise provision made by the Lord in this instance. (1 Nephi, 7.) The one grand purpose of our Father was and is the perpe- tuity of the race; the continuation of mankind. Children are the "heritage of the Lord." No greater blessing could our Father have conferred upon Abraham than to warrant him a multitude of offspring. For he said to him: "In blessing, I will bless thee, and in multiplying, I This was confirmed will multiply thy seed as the stars of heaven." upon Isaac, and Isaac repeated the promise to Jacob, and Jacob bestowed it upon Joseph. Lehi, a decendant of Joseph, beheld in vision his seed, being as numerous as the sands of the sea, upon the land of promise, which was fully realized in after years. This was strictly in keep- ing with the promise made to Joseph by his father Jacob. He said of him that he was "A fruitful bough by a well, whose branches run over the wall." The prophet Nephi says that "Adam fell that man might be, and men are, that they might have joy." We repeat: everything^ that has been revealed is for the purpose of bringing man into the possession of a fulness of glory; which is attained through poster- ity. (Doc. and Gov. 49: 15-17.) Viewing marriage from this standpoint, how necessary it is that every feeling and desire, other than to accomplish the will of our Father, should be suppressed and overcome. It is also the design of the Almighty to bring his covenant children into the possession of such physical strength as to prolong their lives to the age that was reached by the early ancestors of our race. We can do this only by observing the laws of our being. The average length of human life today is about thirty-five years. How necessary, then, that parents should see to it that COURTSHIP AND MARRIAGE. 535 they not only preserve their present physical vitality, but seek to increase it, in order that their children may inherit a strength and vital power not only equal, but superior to their own. For we possess within ourselves recuperative powers which,, if fully devel- oped, would produce marvelous results in a few generations suc- ceeding ours. It was predicted by the prophet Isaiah, in speaking of this dispensation, and it has also been revealed in our day, that man should live to the age of a tree. (Doc. and Gov. 101: 30; Isaiah 65: 22.) Is it not a duty devolving upon us to take the necessary steps looking to such a realization? For the goal can only be reached by gradual steps, along the line of that same physical development of which, as we have already said, we are fully cap- able. Therefore, we conclude that no Latter-day Saint is justified in indulging in the use of those things that the Lord has said is not good for man, the tendency of which is, to poison the springs of life, and thus transmit to children disease in place of health, weakness instead of strength, and an early death instead of a long life. One fruitful source of weakened vitality, as well as the loss of mental power, lies in excesses. This evil must be guarded against with equal determination to abstinence in the partaking of these things that have been forbidden because of their injurious effects. We quote in this connection our original proposition: Marriage is a most sacred obligation, ordained by God for the purpose of procreation. Any thing more or less than this cometh of evil, and, therefore, must result in disaster. To transmit vigorous and healthy bodies to our children should not, however, be the only consideration. Parents are under great responsibility in regard to the proper training of their children, and that, too, along the lines marked out on the revelations that have been given upon this all important subject, and which are most emphatic. (Doc. and Gov. 68: 25-28.) Among the many sayings of Solomon upon this subject, read Prov. 22:6; 29: 15-17. One of the reasons assigned by the Lord for conferring such great blessings upon Abraham was. "For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they 536 IMPROVEMENT ERA. shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment; that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him." (Gen. 18: 18, 19.) When parents have faithfully performed their duty to their children, in this regard, they will be justified; although some of them may become wayward and rebellious, and that, too, desipte every effort that is made in their behalf, in which case, such children will be held solely responsible. Jewish historians all agree that Jewish parents were untiring in their efforts to educate their children in the law of Moses. This, coupled with the teachings of their Rabbis may be assigned as the principal reason why, during so many centuries of time, the Jews have been preserved in the faith of their fathers. While we award all praise to the Sabbath School, the M. I. A. and other organizations where the principles of the gospel are taught, and recognize not only their importance, but also the benefits we derive from them; yet, we all admit that the most potent influence is that which is wisely and properly exercised at home. Parents should see to it that their children receive such a thorough gospel training at home that the labors of the Improve- ment association and Sabbath school teachers are made compara- tively easy, as well as the labors of instructors in other auxiliary organizations that have for their sole object the advancement of the youth of Zion. Secular education, important as it is, cannot be compared with the education of the spirits which dwell in the tabernacles of our children, and came from our Heavenly Father. In short, it is his child, lent to us to see in what manner we will discharge the obligation thus involved. He has stamped upon marriage his divine sanction, and constituted posterity as the highest gift, he can bestow.